From there to here

That’s not surprising when you consider how it all began: being born of Hungarian parents in China, where I lived until we migrated to Australia when I was six. I have lived in five countries, gone to six schools, lived in at least 19 homes, earned social science qualifications in four different disciplines at three academic institutions (BA in psychology, MA in medical anthropology, Graduate Diploma in health education and PhD in health sociology), and worked in at least twelve different occupations as – variously – a psychologist, anthropologist, academic tutor/lecturer, teacher, sociologist, consultant, and researcher in a range of areas, including medical education, media analysis, and ageing and body image issues.

At 80 years of age, therefore, I have accumulated a lifetime (so far) of fascinating and sometimes adventurous experiences while living a fortunate life, happily married to the man I met at 19, and with whom I have travelled the world*, having three wonderful daughters with great partners, and six terrific grandchildren. There have, of course, been tough times. In earlier days they included being thrown in at the deep end in various professional occupations, and learning to keep my head well above water, and to manage the family/work/life balance. There have, also, been sad and challenging times, especially when being carer and advocate for my ageing parents, helping my father through his terminal illness (at just the age that I am now), and my mother with dementia in her later years, living with us. I learnt a lot through all of that, broadening my understanding of some of the complexities that we face and manage in our daily lives and in our society as we age, and culminating in what their deaths have taught me: that – while the grieving lessens over the years – you never get over missing your mother and father.

Meanwhile, constant threads throughout my life have been an overarching interest in people and our stories, and a love of writing and what I see as painting with words, from (unpublished) children’s stories that I’m now enjoying reading to my grandchildren, to just about anything: reports, research grant applications, journal and newspaper articles, book chapters, letters (including to newspaper editors – a lot, of which a provocative few see the light of day), emails, and articles about ageing and related issues – lots and lots of the latter, mostly pro bono to online publications of various organisations with older memberships. They include the EveryAGE Counts Campaign blogsite (where I’m described as a “crusader for ageing”), the Aged Care Report Card's Hello Care magazine, Older People Speak Out [OPSO]'s Life Times newsletter, and the Australian Pensioners & Superannuants League [Queensland]’s Comet magazine. One such article about ageing that The Sydney Morning Herald published (excitingly) as an op-ed on August 6 created quite a stir, with its provocative title of “I’m old and happy, so don’t dare call me young for my age”. It resulted in a follow-up interview on August 9, on ABCPerth Radio, which now seems to be doing the rounds of social media.

And that title is, also, a perfect lead-in to the writing project that I’ve been working on for the past 12 years: a realistically optimistic and comprehensive book on ageing as just another stage that one can actually look forward to and make the most of in many ways (while noting and providing strategies for managing its challenges).  With ageing being a big unknown for many, and something that many others are apprehensive or in denial about, my book Engaging with Ageing: What Matters as We Grow Older – which is finally seeing the light of published day, and is available to purchase here (thanks in very large measure to daughter Jessica’s invaluably ruthless downsizing and Vanessa’s great reader-friendly layout ideas) – aims to be a useful introduction into what growing older is actually all about in our society, as a time to make the most of in our individual ways and circumstances. My heartfelt thanks, too, to daughters Fiona and Vanessa and to website designer Jenna for their major contributions to this stage of my book promotion and website development. And throughout all of this big adventure, as always in the (so far) 61 years since we found each other, I have had my Ian’s steadfast support and never give up or give in approach as my rock.

* But overseas travelling is not in our future – and not because of any possible lingering aftermath of the pandemic, but to lessen our impact on climate change: it’s solar panels and electric car instead.